Theatrical July

The last day of July, I would like to write some stuff for a closing. The theatrical July, from my sadness, loneliness, helplessness, tears to my joyfulness, strength, courage and laughters, seemed a movie playing in front of me.

I counted the past one month what my growth and pain were clearly existed , and felt so abundant for getting a lot of new experiences, such as the blogging world, the alone tours,and making photos into videos. The most meaningful is about those spiritual foods, from my friends and others' posts in their blog.

A beautiful ending of the day is a message from my distant friend. I have to tell you my happiness is far beyond the words. My fantasy thinking somwhat became the reality. From the moment, I will take this as a new start for my advanced lessons. Wish you be my superviors and keep watching me in the future...

Unsuitable Shoes?

Today We are going to talk about shoes. I got a slide from a friend which contents described the shoes as a kind of metaphor on marriage or love relationship.

First I would like to ask you the question.

"When will you feel uncomfortable in wearing shoes? new one? bigger or smaller? sand in it? or other else."

Well, then what will you do? Change another shoes? For sure the solution will depend on the cause you suffered.

Actually I'm afraid to wear a new shoes since they are always a bit tight at the beginning. But you know an old one should come from a new one. I still had to wear them a few times till getting loosen. Sometimes I wore them and felf sand in it, I would clean out the sand instead of changing another shoes.

A nice marriage or love relationship doesn't mean to live with a perfect person. We just want to meet a suitable partner. Once you found one, you should pay much efforts on the maintenance like you periodically do that on your good or favorite shoes. How often you do that, how strong it will be.

Here is another point worth mentioning. Remember that we can't force the other to wear an unsuitable shoes. Such as we had different views and customs, we should learn how to respect or accept that. Never try to change them. It would be temporary if the one was forced to do. Those unlikely pattern of behavior will go back to its original point eventually.

A good shoes can be worn for years and years. Like a suitable partner can share our life either in a good or worse condition. As my post of "Beautifully Imperfect" on July 10, I wish we all have a good partner along with and keep an wonderful love of lifetime....

Prayer..May My Dream Come True

For you, my dear partner...

I didn't expect to hear of your voice under that occasion. You sounded better than my latest call to you. It's so queer I dreamed of you last night. Maybe it's the extension of my daylong missing.

In my dream...

You were as gentle as before.

Holding my small hands tightly with a tender smile.

Still less words while staring at me.

I almost felt your heartbeat at that moment.

No need words I could understand you must have been experienced a lot of difficulities.

I prayer....

A new page is open from now on.
We will pass through all the barricades in front of us.

Our relationship will become stronger after this unconnected period.

We may make up the time we lost.

Training myself to become more understanding and lovely.

Learning to be more capable of bringing happiness and supports for each other.

Sharing our life easily, exchanging our thoughts naturally, and keeping our passion continuously.

You used to say we have a lot of time for the future. It sounds like another kind of commitment, and make me believe we may have many opportunities to bulid an abiding relationship.

Here I am, still the one you know....

Everything Will Be Arranged In The Best Way

I got a good quote from a friend, 'Everything will be arranged in the best way'. It made me feel comfortable immediately. I used to make daydream for the upcoming event or condition. When the consquence wasn't up to my expectation, I would felt lost and disappointed.

Recently I changed my tempo in the ordinary life. To say 'YES' as possible as I can. To accept any proposal as capable as I can. To pay more attention on the moment and listen to the voices around me. I can see a different scenery only by changing another route on my way home. It made my life somewhat filled with freshness.

Here I go to ask for myself to have the following mindset and keep the faith...

Much complaining or staying in the past won't be useful for the current or the future. Each moment will become a part of the past in every second. Once I try my best, I won't regret anyway. It seems I am gradually back to my own track and regain my composure on the decision making.

For sure it's a real world with many imperfections sometimes, but I still have a beautiful dream and won't give up. Just keep marching on the road I chose. I believe tomorrow will be better by my efforts.

Trust Crisis

This Sunday is a quiet day. No one came to visit or call me. It seemed a good timing to do introspection on myself. My issue is about 'trust'.

Two months ago, my partner sent a message and asked me to leave him alone for a certain period. It seemed not a big deal since we all need a private time to deliberate upon what to do sometimes. Since we hardly met together and only communicated by internet, the connection was suddently cut from then. I felt upset for a long period and almost lost my patience. I would call this as a trust crisis.

For sure it's not easy to restart the conversation if the one always kept silent. No way to understand what happened or he encountered some difficulty. What else could I do? I often asked myself the question, then I used to make assumption for his unusual behavior. At that time, I just wanted to make those things seem reasonable.

Lately I replayed the whole story and had a different view on that. If we didn't give the other time to express the inner thoughts, and just guess or presume a cretain worse condition, it's not fair to the other. Most seriously, it's really harmful to the relationship. Both of the two individuals should have an open mind and deserve a chance to listen the other's true voice.

So far I have no idea if we would have the probability to make up what we had lost. I'm still making efforts on tunneling the silent hill. But I really felt thankful for finding something important about respectation and mutual understanding which I recently learnt from a lot of blogging friends.

探尋昔日採金文化~Visit The Gold Ecological Park

前兩天, 貼心的老同學寄了封信, 有幾個博物館開放憑發票免費參觀的好康, 我們決定去趟金瓜石的黃金博物館, 既然難圓淘金夢, 就暫時藉著採金歷史想像那段黃金歲月.

從台北到金瓜石的交通真得很便利, 尤其對我這總是靠著公共交通工具遊走天涯的人, 不須費啥心思, 我們在忠孝復興捷運站1號出口搭乘基隆客運 "台北--金瓜石", 終點站就是我們的目的地.

園區裏還保有許多的日式建築, 層層疊疊的台階和蜿蜒小徑, 別有一番尋幽訪勝的意境, 近七月末的艷陽依然熾熱, 兩人一邊忙著按快門, 可也沒忘了打傘避暑! 走了不少的路, 終於到了園區裏的黃金館, 陳列著當時的採礦工具、坑道系統模型及礦區的運輸系統, 我這走馬看花的個性依然, 延著參觀路線走完後, 約莫也把前面看過的忘了一半, 不過可沒落掉去觸摸那傳說中重達220.3公斤的純金金磚.

結束了短暫的黃金夢, 我們驅車到了九份老街, 餓昏了的倆人, 延路品嚐試吃小點後, 竟然吃了賴阿婆的芋圓就飽了, 老人家真是不行, 一點戰鬥力都沒有. 老街裏有很多的特色小店, 走到盡頭, 有一排可以觀海景的餐廳林立, 可惜, 今天的雲層太厚, 灰濛濛地, 像感情的曖昧階段, 給人留著無限的想像空間...
午后近三點時, 感覺到雨滴零落的問候, 變天了, 這氣象預報真是準! 車來了, 我們要回台北囉...

Today an old friend and I have a short visit to the Gold Ecological Park which is located in the northeast corner of Taiwan. A very beautiful and oldish place. As its brocher said, 'let us travel back in time, to explore this area's former mining culture, and discover the rich and intensely interesting traditions of the Jinguashi settlements.'
Enjoy the tour!
http://www.gep-en.tpc.gov.tw/econtent/about/about.asp

Learning To Love

Today's program is about 'love'. I just read some articles sharing from my following blogs and found a few priceless points. Here I would like to talk with you what's my learning.
From the post of mountainmama's 'LOVE' , I try to think of the reasons why I care about someone so much. If you have a partner too, you may write out as I did the following.

1. he's a gentle guy and always considerable about details.

2. he has integrity and resposibility in doing his jobs, and pays most of his time on working.

3. he's sweet and shy. He was used to expressing his feelings via love songs.

4. he always did his best on my needs.

5. he's a sentimental person, but less words.

6. he looks like a big child while smiling.

7. he let me feel I am indispensable to him in some way.

8. he is filial toward his parents.

9. he's very sensitive about the changeable environment.

10. he's warmhearted to his dogs.

I would like to keep and only remember those beautiful memories, his goodness and sweetness. The negative emotion ever exited but shouldn't stay long. No matter how the future become between us, I am really thankful for his participation in my life and give the growth on my spirit. It's an important lessons I learned for my past months.

Here I also have made a self-examination about the interpersonal relationship. In most cases, we would be attracted by someone's certain characteristics at the very begining. However, as the time goes by, those might be looked as shortcomings under an unpleasant circumstance.
Such as a pretty considerable woman might do too detail to give the others pressure, and a practical man might be very cool in some way. We almost forgot the attractive power and passion between two different individuals.

I like the quote very much and want to state here for you.

"The act of love is to say: 'I want you to be who you are.

' The act of abuse is to say: I want you to be who I want you to be.

' It is that simple."

— James D. Gill

Like I ever said, life is always filled with uncertainty. It's now! Just do it and express your feelings whenever you think of something or somebody means to you, because we have no idea what would happen in the next second. Give a big and warm hug to the one you love and care, your lover, your family, your friends...

Remembered By Someone

I met a former colleague on my way home this evening. Actually we weren't closed when we were coworkers, but I was surprised that she still remembered my name even after seven years. I felt sweet in my heart to be remembered by someone.

In the other situation, if we didn't take a look each other for twice then, we would miss the chance to chat for a few minutes. Such a wonderful fate always happens everywhere.

Next time if I meet you in a certain corner of the earth, I wish I can call your name without thinking to give you the same sweetness. And the most important thing is you could still remember me...

Smile, Please!

Hi, how are you doing today? A blue Monday? Hope it's not.

Wow! Since my boss is going on a business trip in China for a whole week, my colleagues seemed more delightful today. We 'stole' a bit of time to had a short break during working hours this afternoon. Everybody looked tired and stressed recently. Sometimes, too many jobs plugged in a tight schedule will drive us to go crazy or make us impatient. Then you almost forgot how to smile and breathe.

Like the machine need grease, we need a break to recharge ourselves. If it's hard for you to find time to rest, just close your eyes for a second to have a deep breath, then smile to yourself.

I believe you will become powerful to keep walking longer.

Now please follow me to take a mirror and look at your smiling face, how cheerful you are! You alway know we will make things better tomorrow by our faith, don't you?

Release Your Stress

Many of us might have the experience of sleeplessness. I think most cases were due to the stress of jobs, finance, emotions or something unsure. Through my friend Dan Perin's recommendation, I visited Raven Dana's blog 'Ask The Stress Wizard ' and found the article 'Reduce Stress, Get More Sleep'. Hope it would be helpful for you.

http://thestresswizard.blogspot.com/2009/07/reduce-stress-get-more-sleep.html

"陶"醉遊記~鶯歌陶瓷老街

朋友, 最近的煩心事特別多吧? 加上暑氣難消, 火氣肯定不小! 周末囉, 咱們今天去鶯歌"陶"冶一下性情, 出去走走吧!

一早出門, 這風可不小, 颱風進不來的天空, 雲還是跑得飛快, 這樣的天氣出遊正好, 但想"雲淡風輕"嘛....一個字, "難".....

用了4種交通工具, 公車、捷運、火車, 還有我勤奮的雙腿11路, 終於.....到了鶯歌的陶瓷老街. 說也奇怪, 這個地方, 緊鄰我的老家, 卻從來沒來過, 似乎記憶裏, 總是坐在車上遠遠地看著煙囪吐氣的窯子和製陶的工廠.
人啊! 真的很奇怪, 總是汲汲營營地去探索離家很遠的地方, 而常常忽略了周遭, 那些幾乎是伸手可及的...

陶瓷老街裏, 說起來這街景是新舊雜陳, 得小心查訪才能感覺到"老"的味道. 但每個店家裏可都是淘寶地, 還有很多的陶藝教室, 別客氣! 隨時坐下就有人招呼你, 開始上課. 至於我, 還是樂於作個觀眾, 在一旁欣賞就夠了.

雖然說是悠閒漫步, 但接近中午時, 還是抵不過太陽先生的熱力, 揮汗如雨的我. 盼著能找個可以歇腳吹冷氣的地方吧! 大概是老天爺應許了我的願, 走著走著, 到了一家很有"靈氣" 的餐廳-老街風情館. 這兒的特色餐是"煙囪飯", 服務員告訴我把上層的"煙囪"蓋打開就可以了, 鮮吧! 打賭你這輩子肯定沒吃過. 店內的裝潢, 每個角落都看到老闆的心思, 不顧旁人的異樣打量, 我忍不住多拍了幾張, 想好好的回味回味...

充完電, 告別了它, 下一趟不知何時再相遇? 就隨緣吧...

I had a short visit on YinGo Old Street. The downtown is famous for its pottery and porcelain. Some kind of the oldish sreet is a nice place for treasure hunters.
There are many peculiar stores. Wish you have your time to visit it.
http://yingo.area.com.tw/job.cgi?ca=job&cj=j01&areacode=ts029

2009.7.18

(music: Bless the broken road by Raascal Flatts)

A Day

How long a day is? Persons in happiness always wish the moment staying forever while persons in sadness ask for the time passing by fast. As for the persons in long distance love, a waiting period seems like a whole year long...

Early in this morning, I was taking a bus on my way to the office and impressed by a scene but felt disappointed. An old lady with her bicycle walked along the sidewalk and almost fell down. A young man passed by and dodged quickly instead of giving her a hand. He just kept reading newspapers. The other passengers were also cool then. I saw the old lady took a sigh and tried to stand steadily. In such a rush hours it seemed a normal situation and reflected how cool we might be.

My ordinary life is without much surprising stuffs. It seems the day is as usual. But in my views, no news is a good news. It means nothing worthy to worry about so far.
Usually in the afternoon hours, I am not so concentrated sometimes during my working time. Even in the meeting, something or someone would cross my mind, especially when I didn't like those boring topics. Maybe I ever felt sorry to my boss but only for a while. It's not a good custom actually. As you know, all the daydreams won't last long. We still live in the real world.

How to start a brand-new day and filled in full energy? Have you ever asked yourself? Or you just let your time pass away without your dreams or goals day by day? Lately I used to tell myself, no matter what I pursue, either a thing, a timing, or a person, there is alway a focus today and give me a good reason for making efforts. Maybe I have to take a long time to reach the destination, and I should have no regret about my own choice. I wish you may have the same mindset to find what you want.

To He Who Likes Thinking

I would like to share my experience on recently writings.
In the beginning, I wrote down my feelings in a very tough situation while I met certain something wrong. I tried to call out the deepest part of me to stand by me and face my problems together. It's a good way to release my pressure on the "Notes". Let me feel that I was not alone then.

Now through blog editing I found another side of me. It allows me to express my feelings, sharing good stuffs and exchange thoughts with my friends by internet. Sometimes I can seek out discussion forums, others' blogs and got answers to assist me. It's a very precious harvest in my life.

These days I reminded of someone. All my recent changes should owe to his silent attitude during the period which gave me all the inspirations. He always liked thinking so much and slept less. I saw his white hairs growing more and more whenever I met him.

Life is not easy actually, but we can make it in a simple attitude. Maybe writing down what you thought would be helpful to you sometimes. Clear the barriers of your mind everyday. Via that you may review and compare all over each log of your thinking, then you would have a clear picture for what to do next or rearrange the priority of all things. If not, at least it might be helpful to relieve your pressures when you were upset .

Let's Cheers! For all the uncertainties in our life. Anytime, I will stand by your side wherever you are. That's what friends are for...

Here is a good article for sharing with you:

http://lifecentering.blogspot.com/2009/07/sun-also-rises.html

An Article Regarding Respecting Love

A few days ago my classmate gave me some precious words regarding love attitude from her follower's blog. Today I found the entire article and would like to share with you.

Here I posted some parts of my favorites.

http://christianwalktowarddestiny.blogspot.com/2009/07/respecting-love.html

To My Friends Who Are...MARRIED
Love is not about "it's your fault", but "I'm sorry", not "where are you' but "I'm right here", not "how could you" but "I understand", not "I wish you were", but "I'm thankful you are."

To My Friends Who Are...NOT SO SINGLE
Love isn't about becoming somebody else's "perfect person." It's about finding someone who helps you become the best person you can be.

To My Friends Who Are...HEARTBROKEN
Heartbreaks last as long as you want and cut deep as you allow them to go. The challenge is not how to survive heartbreaks but to learn from them.

To My Friends Who Are...NAIVE
How to be in love: Fall but don't stumble, be consistent but not too persistent, share and never be unfair, understand and try not to demand, and get hurt but never keep the pain.

To My Friends Who Are...PLAYBOY/GIRL TYPE
Never say I love if you don't care. Never talk about feelings if they aren't there. Never touch a life if you mean to break a heart. Never look in the eye when what you do is lie. The cruelest thing a guy can do to a girl is to let her fall in love when he doesn't intend to catch her fall.

To My Friends Who Are...SINGLE
Love is like a butterfly.. The more you chase it, the more it eludes you. But if you just let it fly, it would come to you when you least expect it. Love can make you happy but often times it hurts, but love's only special when you give it to someone who is worth it. So take your time and choose the best!

I don't know what's your understanding after reading. As I read those sentences, I felt myself so tiny in the world. About love, I knew less actually.
How to manage a pleasant and lasting relationship between two closed but independent persons? Only spend time on knowing his or her needs and expectation is not enough. Add-in sharing and inspiring each other. Sometimes making surprises to refresh life is also important.
Moreover, just do what we are pleased to do without asking for his or her feedback, and never trying to change the other's nature.
Well, I think there are still a lot of lessons for me to keep learning in life.

Smart Living For Retired Friends

I got some humorous notes by an old friend's sharing. Here I extracted some sentences from that for your crazy thinking. I also wish I may have the pleasant mood and smart living attitude till that age.

Q : How many days in a week?
A : 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday

Q : What's the biggest gripe of retirees ?
A : There is not enough time to get everything done

Q : Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors?
A : The term comes with a 10% percent discount.

Q : What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire ?
A : NUTS !

Q : What is the best way to describe retirement?
A : The never ending Coffee Break

Q : What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
A : If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.

Q : What do you do all week?
A : Monday to Friday; Nothing, Saturday & Sunday I rest.

Well, so far have you found the goal after your retirement? No need to rush to a day dream.
Like the words saying,
Happiness is a voyage, not a destination, there is no better time to be happy than NOW.
Live and enjoy the moment.

慢活 Slow Living

This photo slide was shared from a friend.

蛙大在散漫

http://www.frogfree.com/lazyfrog/

You may find the beautiful scenery of east Taiwan. I felt touched by the author's observation on such simple things.

Hope you will like it too.

Sometimes, we need to slow down our steps and think over what we pursue? Did you ever ask yourself 'Am I happy today? ' If not, just do it from now on.

Today, I feel good! Enjoying editing jobs on my blog, though there is something still confusing me, but I will hand it over to time.

Well, how about you?

隨喜的學習Learning From the Ordinary Things

很久沒去大安森林公園了, 想去走走...Nothing to do but just go around..

夏日早晨, 不消說, 陽光依然熱力放送, 晒得人無處可躲. 在露天劇場的座位上, 吃了豆漿及燒餅蛋的早餐後, 想拍點照片充充版面. 也許是夏季酷暑的關係, 除了一片片綠草坪和樹木外, 花的數目和種類明顯得少了許多. 正當遺憾之際, 意外瞥見萬綠叢中一支 "天堂鳥"時, 心裏突然有股絕處逢生的感動.

The beautiful flower 'Bird of Paradise' standing alone in the grove touched me a lot.

我想, 在平淡的日子裏, 平凡的事物中, 也可以很單純自在享受另一種幸福....

From the ordinary things, I found that we might have and enjoy some kind of happiness with a simple and easy attitude in our life.

2009/7/12

散漫出遊 . 隨性走走

最近看了一些朋友分享的風景照和生活照, 覺得很有意思, 動了心想旅行, 既然太遠的地方一時去不了, 索性去趟淡水吧! 體驗一下 "Nothing" 的生活態度, 有時一個人也可以很浪漫....

十一點多, 抵達淡水捷運車站, 緩步出站, 正中午時刻, 人潮還不算多.

延著河岸, 人潮中我散漫的走著, 拍了幾張河景, 這個地方, 離家不遠, 心卻可以飄得很遠很遠.....
隨性到小店裏看看古玩. 回味兒時記憶, 正中午的淡水, 喝杯"阿媽的酸梅湯", 歇歇腳吧!
王文華說: "沒有愛情的時候, 你就多吃", 對於"為什麼沒有愛情?"或者是"愛情為什麼沒有了?" , 至今對我仍是個謎, 不過至少我知道我餓了, 該找吃的了... " Live and Eat! "

酷熱的午后, 我離開了淡水, 轉到龍山寺, 虔敬地向菩薩祈福和請求祂指點迷津.... 祂說 " 再等些時候吧! "

下午三點多, 回到熱鬧的信義商圈, 駐足在新光三越停車場上名為西藏自由音樂會, 台上嘶吼的歌聲, 老實說我用力聽了還是沒聽懂他們唱得是什麼? 但我可以清楚感受到台上激情和台下聽眾的共鳴. 延著新光三越的香榭大道, 習慣性的看到一個個為著理想努力的街頭藝人, 感動之外, 我默默地為他們祝福...

艷陽下, 我信步地走著到了101, 快到家了....

2009.7.11

Beautifully Imperfect

Today I got a Singaporean Advertising vedio shared by a friend. As the comment, it's worthy to watch no matter you are married or not.

All our life, most of us always keep looking for a perfect partner with many conditions. But how about ourselves? Am I perfect too?

The vedio also reminded me of a movie named " The Last Words". What would you like the people praising you before your dead body buried into the earth?

Wish we may learn something from that.

The most impressive and touching parts as belows.

In the end, it ’ s these small things that you remember.
It ’ s these little imperfections that make them perfect for you.
So, to my beautiful children: One day, you too find yourself lifepartners, who are as BEAUTIFULLY IMPERFECT as your father was to me.

到生命的最後， 總是這些小小的事情，讓我們永遠記得。 是這些小小的不完美』，一起組成生命的『完美』。

所以我想告訴我的子女，有一天，你也能找到你們生命中的伴侶，他們會像你爸爸在我眼中一樣『不完美得很美』。

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mx9ocubowMs&feature=player_embedded

Outlandish Advertisement

Ha Ha! I bet you never saw the scene! She is drinking Taiwan Beer..

What a queer combination.

Place: NewYork NewYork Department Store, Taipei

Date : 2009/6/14

Ask the Fortune Teller

Have you ever the experience to ask the fortune-teller something. Especially when you confused or had no idea about decision making. I just did once a few days ago. You wouldn't believe that if you weren't there.

What you have to do is only write down your name or your friend's name, and pick a number for each one. Then you may get a lot of answers or the current situation what you ask. They do have an incredible capability to describe your sit and location in your office just only giving them your office address. It seemed they were also there.

My understanding is no matter what the fotune-teller told or suggested you, all the consequence would be resulted from your inner thoughts, attitudes and the following actions. You may say that let life unfold by itself, but shouldn't forget that you are the real in charge of your life...

The Best Wish to My Distant Friend's Birthday

Today is my distant friend's birthday. Here I woulk like to express my greetings through my blog.

Hi my dear friend,

Happy birthday and I wish you all the best as you ever blessed me.

Life is alway filled with changeable situations. Sometimes we could hardly handle that by ourselves.

No matter what you encountered or might feel frustrated in the future, may you have the courage to keep walking through all the barricades in your life...

Desert Time - Almond Piece Cookies

After a long period of lazy mood, I suddently awaked from a daydream. This evening I tried to refresh my mind and made deserts again. I choose 'Almond Piece Cookies' with the simplest recipes.

Wish you like it and have fun if you have interests in handmade cookies.

Recipes:
1. Powdered sugar : 100 grams (or more as you like)
2. All-purpose flour : 50 grams
3. Maize powder : 10 grams
4. Entire egg : 2
5. Egg whites: 2
6. unsalted butter(melted) : 50 grams
7. Almond piece : 300 grams

Procedures:
1. the powdered sugar adds the flour, maize powder sieving to mix evenly.
2. add the entire egg and the egg whites to mix evenly.
3. add unsaulted butter and the almond piece to mix evenly and gently.
4. place on the oven plate with parchment paper in a circle shape then put in the upper of the oven.

* the oven 170℃ preheating 10 minutes.
* roast about the approximately 15-20 minutes.

You may also visit the website for the Manderine information.

http://www.baking-house.com.tw/ctlg-new/front/bin/ptdetail.phtml?Part=spu2&Rcg=50100471.0

Little Street Artists

Today I passed by VIESHOW SINEMAS and saw a group of kids playing the drums. It sounded like a serial harmonious musical chords.

I adored their bravery to show themselves in the front of those strangers..

To those whom I love

Much thanks for you always standing by my side and giving full supports...

You decorate my life...

Surviving in the Complex World

Lately, I felt so frustrated in seeing those who tried to achieve and protect their own benefits by denying the others' efforts or hurting their feelings, both often happened in their career and personal feelings.

I'm wondering is that the life we all pursue for? In my auditing job of the last few years, I had met some management people knowing well how to manipulate their rights or background to 'kill' somebody. I always remind of myself not to be a goon by those people.

I think that choosing words carefully and communicating patiently will be a good way to build mutual trust. We might have our concerns in our position, but the important thing is not to do the harmful thing on the others.

Try to leave some space for them to breathe as capable as we can.
Maybe you won this run but would lose in the next. Who knows? God knows that!

Taipei, 2009/7/3

Sad Ending of Their Love? or Not Yet?

Something sad happened to my close friend lately. Someone left her suddently without any reason and notification.
All the tragic story began in a SMS from her boyfriend asked her to leave him alone for a certain period. Regretfully, that guy still postponed the conversatin with her by worse excuses again and again. He ever toped the fabricated charge on her as a debt collector just due to ten or above calls to ask for a reason about his cool attitude.

I think if you really care about someone, you won't look upon those phone calls as offending your privacy. His last sms reply was like a knife and broke everything they ever had, and her last blind waiting was still without his any words. How about your thinking? Is that what we called respect to each other?

I just read an article from a website. "Woman mostly hates the man not to speak." The man is not braver than the woman on facing the problems. The man always adopts the silence while the woman adopts the tears as their strategy. Maybe time can almost heal everything, but the regret would be left in the rest life.

If we ever promised someone we should keep our words in our mind. Once you broke the matual trust with someone, you couldn't ask for the other to obey the game rule. Why lovers turn into strangers? 'Merry gathering and happy parting'. Mature people should learn how to communicate properly in an understanding way. To hold the best timing to express our real thoughts to those whom we ever loved or cared is very important. If the fate among us came to the end, we should say farewell peacefully, thank each other for ever giving you a sweet world, and bless them for another life journey. Either silence or tears can't solve any problem.

In the other way, if we always try to hide the truth, the fuzzy matter will become clearer by itself. I do believe that God will teach those immature people to learn more lessons through certain cases in proper timing. Someday we all will be more capable to bring happiness to those whom we loved.

Back to the sad story, so far, my friend is still waiting and holding a chance to hear that man's saying. Hope the 'wise man' would show up and be frankly talking to her. You might laugh at the silly woman, but I sincerely bless her waiting will be worthy.

The journey's end will be another journey's start. Let's learn together to be a more understanding and tolerant person. It's not easy but worthy to make efforts!

Taipei, 2009/7/1

隨緣?

不知道是怎樣的緣份? 在離開上海前的最後一夜, 入住酒店的房間是剛來上海的同一間"504".
來去之間, 心情有很大的落差, 用 “身心俱疲”, 還不足以總結這段出差的日子, 但心靈的收獲卻是很多很多…應該為自己乾杯, 這樣的洗禮, 活至今, 是從沒經歷過的…

"隨緣"二字, 以前的我, 說得瀟灑, 現在想來真的是輕狂,
那些在我們生命中經過的人事物, 都是緣份, 好的、不好的、苦的、甜的, 都是要來讓我們承受的, 要讓我們思考或更明白自己為什麼要存在?

你所努力經營的現在, 可能得意, 可能失意, 都不是我們能全然左右的, 但至少過程中, 用心也用力了...
下一步, 我在哪兒? 下一秒, 什麼事會發生? 看似你可以掌控的, 卻早已在冥冥之中安排好的, 不管你信不信, 主宰你的心的, 有時不一定是你自己, 更何況是命運…一個 “隨”字, 學問太深, 這世間千千萬萬個結, 遭逢到的, 要能釋然, 怕是要用下半輩子來領會學習的…

上海, 2009/6/12

遠距愛情4~甦醒

該是個畫下句點的時候? 為這段短暫也曾經令人心動的感情祝賀及悼念? 故事, 是否停留在曖昧的這一頁?

他曾經對妳付出的愛和真誠, 在那動人的時刻, 相信都是存在的, 也還清楚的記著他的眼神, 彷彿他整個人跟心都要交給妳似的, 在離別的時刻握痛妳的那雙大手也好像是剛剛發生過的事, 所有甜蜜回憶的畫面, 一次又一次的在眼前播放.

只是, 愛情, 在瞬間褪色, 在沒有任何徵候的預告下, 讓妳措手不及, 心中充滿了疑問,急於想知道那個答案.

夢, 似乎醒了, 妳慢慢知道自己不能再被動的等待, 妳清楚的想表達自己的需要, 勇敢的去問個答案, 想知道他想要的愛情樣子和互動方式. 怎奈啊…他那想以時間拖延的藉口, 卻以強人姿態掩飾他自己的不安?
如果, 妳用了十來通的電話, 發現他不接之後, 收到一則令你錯愕又難堪的簡訊, 該怎麼去想這個難題? 一向溫柔體貼的他, 突然用責備妳的語氣和一直沒說出口的理由, 令妳錯愕, 無數個夜裏輾轉難眠、妳還是百思不解?

等待, 等他的說法…
大概是他已無暇顧及一個等待的心, 到了這個令人不解幾乎要掀開謎底的時刻, 說了要妳等他, 也沒出現時, 似乎是他理所當然的累而沒通知妳. 是怎樣的難處? 讓他最終還是不夠勇敢的去面對妳的困惑.
曾經那樣不對等付出的傻勁, 妳總是覺得幸福而甘願承受. 即使至今, 妳依然割捨不下那份對他的疼愛. 或許, 他真的面對莫大的困頓, 就算是對曾經交心的伴侶都無法開口?

倆人相處的過程難免會有考驗, 也都該用心學習互相體諒及包容. 這一段路有緣有幸相伴, 是個福份. 來日, 若緣份真的走到了盡頭, 也要好好的道別. 不能一起飛雖然是個遺憾, 但放手讓彼此都能海濶天空, 互相感謝曾經真誠的付出, 學習如何相愛, 又何嘗不是另一種幸福呢…

遠距愛情3~等待

有好一陣子, 那人沒了音訊, 就發了一通簡訊, 說是閉關, 讓人別理他.
前些日子, 因為那通簡訊, 她把自己攪和得心神不寧, 夜裡翻來覆去的, 無法入眠. 周末, 這個下班的傍晚, 她走在路上, 耳裏聽著他給的歌, 沒來由的, 突然有了莫名的能量, 彷彿可以承担這 “等待” 的累.

那個男人說是孩子氣, 骨子裏卻是個大男人主義, 她也不是不懂他, 只是對他突來的冰點情緒感到困惑, 有幾度, 她以為是自己做了什麼讓他不開心的事, 才會令他這些日子不願跟她說話.

情人間, 總能輕易地說 “愛” , 一個既甜蜜又沉重的單字. 這段沉澱期, 倒是引發了很多心靈的思考, 無意間看到網路上的一段話說得很令人省思：
“接受的過程是充分瞭解的一個過程，接受不僅包括接受他的長處，尤其包括接受他的缺陷、情緒，方方面面的缺陷。感情上的東西是希望平等對話的，你在感情中才會有意思，那種默契關係才會非常持久，你到老了可能都不會厭倦。你跟一個人待了十年二十年，一個眼神就可以交流，這種樂趣是很難替代的。”

只是過程的學習啊… 如人飲水、冷暖自知!

Taipei, 2009/6/19

遠距愛情2~預感

最近, 我愛上了王文華文章裏的一段話:
風吹乾了我就走
活到某個年紀，吃過足夠苦頭，我們的直覺就是那一陣風。當那陣風告訴你該走，你要順著風走。

學習放開, 並不是件容易的事…..

她想起他曾經要她三思, 說是跟他走這段路並不容易, 也說心疼她, 因為他不能給她對等的, 最近, 她常想起這些瑣碎片斷的對話, 反覆思量…
怎知, 對於情愛的執著其實是她的個性使然, 一如對周遭的人事物, 常常深陷其中而難以跳脫…..

那男人對這愛情觀似乎是很 “柏拉圖” 式的, 不多不少的, 這樣的遠距關係, 讓他來去之間收放自如, 而這點, 是她這傻女人永遠也學不來的, 有時, 她也弄不清他的思緒…
他常稱她是 “知己”, 以為這男人對她已到了無話不談的階段. 不過, 最近她才體會, 不論再怎麼貼近的關係, 有些禁地是她不能解也無法碰觸的….
他提過幾次她朋友部落格裏的一段話, 也心有所感的說很多人忘了這點:
“respecting their privacy...giving more private time , and space would create a pleasant relationship for all”

是巧合吧! 現在想來, 似乎是預告一段即將上演的 “默劇”…..
在他宣告將 “消聲”希望獨處一段期間的這些日子, 她練習回到夜裡一個人的寂靜, 不用等候的日子, 看來自由卻難掩失落. 她知道在那些倆人共同的回憶和甜蜜對話中, 不自覺地被慣壞了….

人生的功課要學習的, 何止是愛情這門課? 可惜我們在當下, 總是執著, 總是迷惘, 參不透的造化… 怨不盡的緣淺情長….
“順著風走”, 是怎樣境界的智慧啊? 留一些時間和空間好好的沉澱吧.!
細水長流的關係, 是要用心經營的. 是需要瞭解彼此所扮演的角色和對方的期待, 太多或太快…會有壓力, 過於保留或猶豫…又少了些激情, 拿捏取捨之間, 是藝術, 是一輩子的練習題…

2009/6/7

遠距愛情1~最初的悸動

他們認識彼此已有好一段時間了, 但愛情的開始, 是從這年白色情人節深夜一句試探性的 "let's give us a chance to know each other?" 開始萌芽....

雖然祇能藉著電腦傳情, 他們仍能感受對彼此的真誠和需要, 一首首情歌和偶而一句窩心話, 往往能讓她悸動不已...
常常夜裡聊到倆人撐到天亮.....就算累了, 也覺得很甜, 他可能不知道在談天的過程中, 曾經有過幾次, 她偷偷的打了瞌睡, 只因為她捨不得離開那線上遠端的他.

她對他說過, 自己是個很容易掏心的人..
在他面前, 她沒有保留的.......收起最世故的一面, 對他, 用最純淨的感情, 全心的投入...
或許是她太沒有心防, 感情放得太深太快, 快到沒察覺他的脚步沒跟上.....
這樣遠距的感情, 談來表面風平浪靜, 夜裏卻讓人的情緒翻攪, 有時清醒得難以入眠.....
他時而前進、時而卻步的情感對話, 讓她覺得手足無措

這些日子, 他的生活中煩事多了, 這樣的距離...真的是距離, 她看不到他的心思有那麼多的憂慮和煩躁,
她懂他想保有自己的空間.....他常說..這麼多年的習慣一時要改, 改不過來.....要她, 太晚, 別等他上線
她覺得心疼, 卻祇能在遠端守候他偶而出現的短暫問候, 揣度他的心情, 過得好嗎?
而對他, 似乎這一切的關心都是多餘, 那份無力感, 好幾次讓她覺得被關在門外......
只是莫名的覺得他的態度冷到讓她感受不到一點溫度, 幾乎要懷疑自己真的是在跟他談戀愛?

他常說喜歡她的懂事, 她真的懂...所以遇到不順心的事, 也總回他說 "沒關係".....殊不知這樣的感情, 愈愛愈寂寞.
她常常自我催眠地說, 自己可以承受這樣的交往模式......卻不自覺得愈來愈害怕深夜守著電腦螢幕的那份等待和落空的感覺, 偶而在夜深時, 當她寂寞得想聽聽他的聲音時, 卻要擔憂是不是會打擾到他....

2009/5/28

Life is full of question marks

Had you ever met something unfair in your life?

I might have lived for half my life, but I always felt confused why some people could be so cruel regardless of the other's feelings. I often met somebody wrong or something imperfect during my life journey, even with all my heart or efferts . How come? I tried to figure out what's wrong with them or myself? Of course, we couldn't ask for the others to feed back as our expectation, but we still bear a hope to get that.

We have no idea what would happen tomorrow. My simple thinking is just to be nice to those whom we cared or loved and to cherish all we have now. If all things came due to my destiny, either a good or bad fate, I should learn experience from each failure or case. Getting braver and stronger. Never give up to pursue a beautiful mind in the real world. I do believe it exists somewhere.